Translation

I cleaned and typeset it. I'm a beginner at this, so feedback and correction would greatly be appreciated! :)
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1G_yowHWxNgtgAygt8hU-Ty2gGt6h91Jq/view?usp=sharing

>>24227

Thank you for working on this.

There are a couple of guides I like to suggest for editors who are just starting out, or in need of guidance; these are Anon Black's guide, which is currently available in a somewhat disordered fashion on her tumblr page at https://translatoranon.tumblr.com/tagged/guide ; and Red Hawk Scans' guide, republished by Fallen Syndicate Scans, and available with all pictures on the Internet Archive at https://web.archive.org/web/20190912213919/https://fallensyndicate.wordpress.com/typesetting-tutorial/ . Most of what I say is just reiterating items expressed by one or both of these guides.

I'll refer you also to Yuri Project's own guide, available on the wiki at https://wiki.yuri-project.net/Editing%20Tutorial . A lot of what it talks about isn't relevant if you have clean raws ripped from the web, and don't have to deal with cleaning up scanned pages torn from a book; but it still has good information on redrawing and setting type.

When there are stylistic decisions to be made, I often refer to the guidelines listed at https://wiki.yuri-project.net/Guidelines . These can be helpful if you're ever uncertain about some particular element of the editing process.

Attached are some comments about this work in particular. I would like to mention a couple general things to keep in mind, as well:

・You don't have to expand and shrink your text to make it exactly fill the size of a speech balloon. In the original, many balloons contain a large amount of white space, and it's recommended to use the relative text sizes in the original as a guideline for the relative sizes of the translated text. As a rule of thumb, it's good to vary from a main text size by only a pt or two in either direction, for a total range of about three pt sizes.
・The shape of the text block should ideally follow the shape of the text container. For most balloons, this means being thickest in the middle and thinnest at the top and bottom; for a lot of captions, it means keeping the width fairly consistent across all lines to keep it as rectangular as possible. I think that Anon Black does a good job of explaining why this requires some manual intervention in https://translatoranon.tumblr.com/tagged/tutorial in particular.

Again, thank you for your work! I look forward to the next revision.

Thank you for taking your time and giving me wonderful feedback, I really appreciate it.

I will try my best to revision it. Thank you! :)

I've just learned that Anon Black's guide is hosted on Mangadex: https://mangadex.org/title/43627/anonblack-s-typesetting-guide

Thank you! I was wondering where are the other parts at, hehe. and kinda stupid question by what is "Del Rey" style?

https://drive.google.com/file/d/19RwxKunJ_NrhUKxAFpNluex7F160Gw_j/view?usp=sharing

here is the revise ver. hope i did better.
i didn't redraw the effects bcs of just personal prefrence. I would do it if you think it would look better tho.
THANKS!

>>24238

This is an improvement, but there are still a few things to clean up. See attached.

You'll see in the Guidelines ( https://wiki.yuri-project.net/Guidelines ) under "Release Requirements," point 5, that it's recommended that editors either replace the sound effects entirely, or arrange the translated sound effects next to the original ones. This latter approach, where an English translation of a sound effect is placed right next to the unreplaced original, is known as the "Del Rey" approach, because it was used by the Del Rey publishing company when they began localizing manga. (Del Rey's manga arm is now operated as Kodansha's American publishing division. Though the branding has changed, they still employ the same approach. But because they were Del Rey, first, that's the name that's stuck to the translation approach.)

I don't think you have to replace everything if you don't want to; I would encourage you to try to at least arrange the translated sound effects next to the originals, if you're not going to, but I won't require that for this release.

Another thing that I would encourage you to do is go through the text and make sure that when you indicate a break in speech—like this—to use an emdash instead of just a hyphen. Hyphens should still be used when breaking lines in the mid-

dle of a word, or for honorifics such as in Sakura-chan or Torao-sensei. If the emdash character for the font you're using is ugly, try using a hyphen character with the width set to 200%.

Thank you for your work; I'm sorry to have taken so long to reply.

>>24238

Apologies, a couple additional things:

Please export your files as images instead of submitting .psds. The thing under review should be the product we intend to release, which is in this case the rendered images, instead of having to wait for a render after approving the working files. You can find the Yuri Project's guidelines on exporting files at https://wiki.yuri-project.net/Guidelines .

Also, don't forget to include the credits page. There are no requirements or guidelines for credits, but that you should list the names of all contributors, using the name "Anonymous" for contributors who haven't identified themselves; and you must provide a link to the homepage, https://yuri-project.net.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1_E-h8ji_6K0spTSnsGOlb3FQ1OchnA3f/view?usp=sharing

somehow it slipped my mind to check the guidelines, sorry about that. Here is another try. :)
for some of the SFX that has a pattern, I tried to put a similar pattern on it, is that how it should be? or just simple black text?

again, thank you so much for your patience and for taking the time to review my editing. I really appreciate it :)

>>24251

I've seen both appraoches, where the caption for the sound effect is in plain black text, and where the caption is a replication of the original effect; I think that trying to replicate the original effect is the most effective approach, so I'm glad that's the approach taken here.

I think the captions as presented here are at least good enough for a release; but if you want to step things up a little further, I recommend that you attempt to let the caption overlap the original as little as possible. The ultimate goal is legibility; we want it to be easy to read the caption, and for it to be obvious that it's translating the accompanying sound effect. Sometimes, it might be most effective to type every letter of the effect separately so that you can arrange them in a specific way to match the flow of the original (for example, the "waboosh" on 96 seems like a good candidate for this; see also Anon Black ch. 8 https://mangadex.org/chapter/761011/1 ). If overlapping is the only graceful option, don't be afraid to add a stroke to the caption to get it to pop; it may obscure the original a little more, but this edit is destined towards English-language readers, so the legibility of the English always trumps legibility of the original.

Additionally, I see now that I forget to attach my list of revisions to my previous post. These are changes that I still want to see before we release; apologies for my mistake.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1L_JSkLCKDHznhfztsApm6ibd7WXXfGmg/view?usp=sharing

i do think copying the same pattern of the original sfx is a bit better since it goes well with the shading of the manga.
and arranging the sfx letter by letter really does make a big difference. I think it looks more nicer now.
again, thank you so much for being patient ang giving me so much detailed explanations. :)

>>24258

I think it looks even better now. There are just a couple small things to iron out, and then I think we'll be able to release this.

95

...... -> ... (Three dots in ellipsis)

96

waboosh (Thicken stroke)

Um.... -> Um... (Three dots in ellipsis)

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1z3h6mTnWr455YBqrpctbnCmLt2i32i9y/view?usp=sharing

does the ellipsis usually only get 3 dots? that's something I would have to remember.

>>24261

I think this is good to release. Thank you for your patience through all the revisions. Hopefully, in the future, we'll be able to make do with fewer.

Yes, the standard in English is for there to be three dots in an ellipsis. You might see more sometimes, but that's considered non-standard.

Thank you for being patient and teaching me a lot of things. I'll practice more so yes hopefully in the future we can do with less revisions.
Hope to work with you again :)
おつかれさまでした。

>>24261
>>24264
Released.